I have been trying extra hard to stay positive for the past month now, but of course every now and then those little moments of feeling like crap, and feeling ugly, etc. always have their ways of sneaking up on you.
For the past three days I just felt awful about myself, which is never fun. But I came to the realisation that it's the little things that bring joy back into your life, and start making you feel better. Little things like talking to one of your best friends on webcam, and a niece constantly telling you how pretty you are. The little things that make you realise "hey, I don't have it all that bad" of course I don't expect to feel great and 100% all the time, that's just impossible. There's no such thing as perfection and even though we are all so very aware of that fact, it seems as though we're always all trying to chase and achieve some form of perfection.
Today was not by any means a day filled of lots of things. I in fact didn't do much, I got up and had some breakfast, before I worked out, and then got ready for my day, tried a new way of putting makeup on, and then picked my nieces and nephews up from school. I then helped them with their homework when we were done dinner, and even though, they all drive me a little crazy sometimes, and Auntie Katherine feels overwhelmed living with her nieces and nephews at times, I love them all so much, and some times just those little tiny moments I get with them make me smile, and make me realise, that life is wonderful!
P.S.
I'm finally back in the youtube world of vlogging if you want to check out my channel follow this link: http://www.youtube.com/user/KayBots89/videos?view=0
As well as my personal channel I have a collab. channel with my friend Lucy which you can check out here: www.youtube.com/twopottergirls if you like! :)
Wednesday 24 October 2012
Thursday 18 October 2012
Intuition!
I'm back already. I feel like I have so much to talk about lately, or maybe it's more just that I like getting what's on my mind out. I've started feeling like blogging a lot lately, and have been holding myself back a bit. I've made one of the many notepads I own into a sort of journal where I've been writing out things for the past few days that I wanted to blog. I thought blogging every day might just be a bit much, so that the notepad would be a nice second outlet.
It's 4am for me at the moment, and I'm restless. Although I feel tired enough to sleep, my mind is running at about a thousand miles a second, and I felt like now would be a perfect time to write out a blog. Every time I write a blog it seems to be in the very wee hours of the morning, so it must be when my mind is strangely most active.
Anywho, for the past three days now I've been having these feelings in my gut like something big is going to happen, and strangely my mind keeps on going to one major thing, and I keep on pondering it, and wondering how this could come to pass in my life soon, but I suppose it could. Generally when I get this feeling, and something specific comes to mind, I've been right, and this is why I call it my intuition; hence the title of this blog.
So if at some point of summer/fall of 2013 you find me blogging about a move to Ireland or the UK, then we will all know that my intuition was right on track. If this happens, I will be so, so happy, and I truly hope that I am right on this feeling. I keep on having small images of me in Cambridge around Christmas time, which is odd. I don't know why it's specifically Cambridge in these images, especially since I've only ever been there once, but yet it is. However this could also be nothing, and just my very vivid imagination popping things into the visual part of mind (does this even make sense?) that I want to see. Who knows?!
What I do know, is that for a nice change in the last 2 years, I have a plan, and who knows my intuition could just be spot on, and I might just get what I want out of life. I now believe and hope to always believe that if a dream is big enough, and important enough to you, that no matter the hurdles that come your way, you do everything you can, and you work at it, until you're able to reach that dream, because it's worth fighting for!
Sleepy times now, see you next time! :)
It's 4am for me at the moment, and I'm restless. Although I feel tired enough to sleep, my mind is running at about a thousand miles a second, and I felt like now would be a perfect time to write out a blog. Every time I write a blog it seems to be in the very wee hours of the morning, so it must be when my mind is strangely most active.
Anywho, for the past three days now I've been having these feelings in my gut like something big is going to happen, and strangely my mind keeps on going to one major thing, and I keep on pondering it, and wondering how this could come to pass in my life soon, but I suppose it could. Generally when I get this feeling, and something specific comes to mind, I've been right, and this is why I call it my intuition; hence the title of this blog.
So if at some point of summer/fall of 2013 you find me blogging about a move to Ireland or the UK, then we will all know that my intuition was right on track. If this happens, I will be so, so happy, and I truly hope that I am right on this feeling. I keep on having small images of me in Cambridge around Christmas time, which is odd. I don't know why it's specifically Cambridge in these images, especially since I've only ever been there once, but yet it is. However this could also be nothing, and just my very vivid imagination popping things into the visual part of mind (does this even make sense?) that I want to see. Who knows?!
What I do know, is that for a nice change in the last 2 years, I have a plan, and who knows my intuition could just be spot on, and I might just get what I want out of life. I now believe and hope to always believe that if a dream is big enough, and important enough to you, that no matter the hurdles that come your way, you do everything you can, and you work at it, until you're able to reach that dream, because it's worth fighting for!
Sleepy times now, see you next time! :)
Sunday 14 October 2012
Curve Balls
Today's blog is all about life and the many curve balls we are thrown. My life hasn't exactly been my dream cuppa tea, nor has it been horrendous. My life may not have been as fantastical (yes I am aware that this is not an actual word) as I wanted it to have been, but I have come to realise that I wouldn't change it for anything.
I used to, and not even so long ago, sit around and feel sorry for myself. How absurd is that? Why would I want my life to have happened differently? If my past was not my past I wouldn't be the person that I am today. Yes I may not have yet achieved anything great in life, but I am still so very proud of who I am.
I feel and know that greatness will come; and one day I will get my happily-ever-after. But for now I need to start living my life for the moments, instead of in the past, and the unknown future. So to all those curve balls making their way to me now, give me your best, because I am ready to give you mine, and hit a home-run!
I used to, and not even so long ago, sit around and feel sorry for myself. How absurd is that? Why would I want my life to have happened differently? If my past was not my past I wouldn't be the person that I am today. Yes I may not have yet achieved anything great in life, but I am still so very proud of who I am.
I feel and know that greatness will come; and one day I will get my happily-ever-after. But for now I need to start living my life for the moments, instead of in the past, and the unknown future. So to all those curve balls making their way to me now, give me your best, because I am ready to give you mine, and hit a home-run!
Wednesday 10 October 2012
New Beginning
Well it's been a bit longer between posts then I wanted, but here I am again.
I have officially started working which is nice, I thought it might be harder to start working again as I haven't had a job for 6 months, but it's so nice to get out of the house, and have something to do. For now it's just part-time but for part-time my hours are actually fairly decent. Considering I actually have 40 hours scheduled for the next 2 weeks. It may only be about 20 hours a week, but it's much better than nothing. I'd much prefer 30-40 hours a week rather than every two weeks, but I will for sure take what I can get at the moment.
On another note, I haven't been doing so well on the whole "not fantasizing" about my nieces grade 2 teacher, and now I have yet another guy added to the mix (of my fantasies that is...and when I say fantasies I do not mean pervy ones) he's a cute, quite young, ginger lad, from Scotland at work. I've not said more then hello to him, as he only just started today, and today was only my second shift, but boyle he's got two of my weaknesses (ginger hair, and a Scottish accent - sexiest accent out there!) so obviously there will be some sort of fantasizing going on there.
Not much else to report I'm afraid, but will give a puppy update. We named Mini Hercules, Bandit, and his eyes are both opened (one opened yesterday, and one today). His ears are opening as well, and he's growing by the minute. Such an adorable little pup, I keep on trying to persuade my Brother In-Law to let me keep Bandit, but to no avail. Ah well, can't win all of our battles I suppose.
That is all for now, so until next time, buh-bye!
I have officially started working which is nice, I thought it might be harder to start working again as I haven't had a job for 6 months, but it's so nice to get out of the house, and have something to do. For now it's just part-time but for part-time my hours are actually fairly decent. Considering I actually have 40 hours scheduled for the next 2 weeks. It may only be about 20 hours a week, but it's much better than nothing. I'd much prefer 30-40 hours a week rather than every two weeks, but I will for sure take what I can get at the moment.
On another note, I haven't been doing so well on the whole "not fantasizing" about my nieces grade 2 teacher, and now I have yet another guy added to the mix (of my fantasies that is...and when I say fantasies I do not mean pervy ones) he's a cute, quite young, ginger lad, from Scotland at work. I've not said more then hello to him, as he only just started today, and today was only my second shift, but boyle he's got two of my weaknesses (ginger hair, and a Scottish accent - sexiest accent out there!) so obviously there will be some sort of fantasizing going on there.
Not much else to report I'm afraid, but will give a puppy update. We named Mini Hercules, Bandit, and his eyes are both opened (one opened yesterday, and one today). His ears are opening as well, and he's growing by the minute. Such an adorable little pup, I keep on trying to persuade my Brother In-Law to let me keep Bandit, but to no avail. Ah well, can't win all of our battles I suppose.
That is all for now, so until next time, buh-bye!
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